eBook: Download Give Take Helping Others Success ePub (KINDLE, PDF, MOBI) + Audio Version


  • File Size: 1338 KB
  • Print Length: 321 pages
  • Publisher: Penguin Books (April 9, 2013)
  • Publication Date: April 9, 2013
  • Language: English

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Trying to find reading this book for a few days now - finished it last night - and I was already finding myself transforming somewhat of how We operate. In line with the book, We am usually a matcher - one who provides reciprocally, when I determine I will receive in go back. And there is not much completely wrong with that. But, according to Adam Grant and his bevy of research, otherish givers are usually the most successful.

So, let me explain.

There are three broad styles of sociable dealing: taking, matching, and giving. Takers are those who try to take more than they give. Matchers are those who try to give and take proportaionally and conditionally. Givers are those who give more than they take. Takers are mostly self-oriented, matchers are other-oriented as a means to being self-oriented (I'll help you when I think you will help me) and givers are mostly other-oriented.

Here is the counter-intuitive part. If we look at the most successful people - the happiest, the most likely to be promoted, etc - they are generally givers, of course, if we look at the least successful, they as well often tend to be givers. (Takers do moderately well, but over time, few want to handle them. Matchers do okay too. )

This publication is an attempt to describe why becoming a giver is a good 'strategy' to be successful, as well as under what conditions giving is a failing 'strategy. ' First, the positive: simply put, people appreciate givers and giving often makes people want to give back. Since givers help others and often put others' needs as a priority, givers often garner (without deliberately trying - WHICH IS KEY! ) a network of support from others they've helped. Want to communicate most effectively? Ask more questions to others than you give responses, ask for advice, and become aware of how you can help others. Need to bring out the best in people around you? Believe in them by recognizing and appreciating their strengths and contributions. Need to be successful? May think of personal relations as zero-sum games (where others can only win to the degree you lose), but positive sum games (if you win, keep in mind that mean that I lose, but we can all win together).

This might sound obvious, right? But it isn't. Even when we may be givers in our personal lives, we frequently become matchers or takers at work. Even if the success of the giving strategy seems intuitive, it is equally intuitive that getting ahead requires receiving as much as or more than you get, spending almost all of your time and energy working on things that will obviously advantage you, rather than spending more time assisting others at work than getting your own stuff done. Yet Grant cites a growing body of research demonstrating that giving - under the right conditions - really is the best overall 'strategy. '

Of course , I said "under the right conditions. " Precisely what are those conditions? Well, to begin with, one must give with some sort of purpose. Those who don't see some sort of result from their giving often burn off out. (So, fundraising telemarketers burn out less when they can consult with those who their efforts have helped, and teachers burn off out less when they see what their more fortunate students go on to do. ) Also, one must give to others and things that the giver is interested in. (Volunteering for projects and also to help people I value is much easier and fun than for those I care little about. ) Lastly, one must watch out not to be exploited by takers, who can often seem like givers in their agreeableness, but be exploitative in the end. (And Grant gives some good advice how to find real givers versus takers who are good actors. )

So, all of this is what Grant calls 'otheerish giving. ' Giving selflessly versus giving somewhat selfishly is, Grant writes, what finally separates successful from unsuccessful givers. Offer, but make sure one is giving with a sense of purpose, and also to people and things one likes you. Give, but not when it comes IN THE EXPENSE of one's own projects.

And this is the one section of criticism I have for Grant's otherwise well-written and VERY interesting book. He doesn't execute a great job distinguishing between matchers (those who give when they think there will be something on their behalf in return), and otherish givers (those who give selectively).. On their face, I think We have an understanding of the difference, but the ideas are very closely related.

One other small area of criticism: does it seem sensible to urge others to offer, but then point out that giving is a good strategy to success? If one adopts giving as a strategy for success, then doesn't that mean, in a sense, that they are takers (giving because they be prepared to gain more than they provide ultimately)? Grant warns from this tendency, telling us that giving because one expects ultimate benefits - is often a self-defeating strategy that others can detect. Yet, doesn't the mere reality that Grant's whole point is to exhibit that and how giving is finally a winning strategy mean that many people WILL adopt it somewhat artificially because they expect a payoff? (I don't see how their avoidable. )

Anyway, We did gain a great deal from this book. Not really only have I found myself monitoring some of my interpersonal dealings by the advice given in this book, but it's given me insights into what working styles many of my colleagues have (which impacts how I offer with them). Very good book not only provides some very interesting research, but should be able to give people some good and usable advice.

Oh, and as one final teaser... chapter 3 clarifies why Jonas Salk - typically renowned as a giver for refusing to patent his polio shot - is actually a taker., very inspiring, informative and supported by research.
The only thing is that the book is at some points rather long. A liltte more modifying could have done the publication more justice. Other than this I would suggest reading this book as it does not only addresses the dissimilarities between givers, takers and matchers, but it also covers the pitfalls of each of the styles, which will help you actively decide what type of person you'd like to be., I've always struggled to integrate my personal and professional lives, needing to give and bless others as much as possible, but feeling that this set me upwards for failure in the business world. This publication breaks that myth, demonstrating that givers can succeed both personally and expertly without becoming doormats. Along with a deft blend of research and anecdotal evidence, Grant shows that, contrary to expectations, givers frequently increase to the top of their professions. He then clarifies some of the psychological forces that put them there (it's not all just good karma). He or she includes advice how to change your own reciprocity style to become more giving.

If you're a giver, you know a giver, or you want to become one, then read this book., Thought and introspection provoking book. Nevertheless , at least some of the champion " givers" profiled in the publication seem to have become political flame throwers, and such behavior which would seem to limit one's potential networking (unless you marginalize those on the outside I suppose)., This has become one of my personal favorite textbooks. Adam Grant is an excellent author and I am happy I was introduced to his work. This publication gives you a great look into givers, takers, and matchers. It breaks it down and provides you insight in ways I haven't seen before. Eye-opening and thoughtfully designed book - I am eager to read his other writings., This book has changed my life, and I seldom say that. By providing substantial evidence of the advantages of becoming a giver, Hersker Grant explains precisely why it is better to give in order to receive. We have incorporated Grant's work into my speeches, I frequently discuss and recommend this book to my friends and colleagues, but almost all of all, I've been motivated as part of your to give to others and think less about myself.

" Offer and Take" and Lalu Harris's " 10% Happier" are the two best books I read in 2014, and I'm pleased to Adam Grant for reminding us of the value of thinking about how our actions affect others., This is the most valuable business publication I possess ever read. We think it can apply to any section of your life really, but We especially found it great for a lot of the marketing materials I have to create for insurance as well as presentations I share with Employer groupings seeking out insurance benefits. I ended up preference this book so much that I now followed the author Adam Grant on both LinkedIn and Twitter.

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