File Size: 3612 KB
Print Length: 248 pages
Publisher: Atria Books; Reissue edition (March 8, 2004)
Publication Date: March 2, 2004
I forgive you.
I actually love you.
What is the connection between these simple statements and deep occasions of grace? I actually didn't understand it personally until reading "The Things That Matter Most: An e book About Living. " The writer is Dr. Ira Byock, a physician who centers on end-of-life care for his patients and the family members. As he recounts their personal stories, you'll shake your head with question as damaged relationships are transformed and healing will take place when none seemed possible. The message though, is never to withhold these words till the end, but to consciously integrate them into our daily lives.
Fair warning - you'll probably cry while reading this book and, if most likely like me, it is going to tap into regrets long since tucked away. Yet, with it comes a sense of hope that all is not lost. That will there is still time to let go of old hurts and say the things that matter most - not merely for the benefit for those we love, but for yourself., I love Dr. Byock which book. I have purchased it several times to give to others, and use the ideas regularly in my practice. Written simply, with important stories of real experiences, this book is a gem for those working in palliative care, health-related, or families accompanying loved ones in the final years, months of their journey., I wish to give thanks to Ira Byock for writing this book and discussing with us his experience, his humanity. Dr Byock's writing shows a humility that I admire. Reading this book constitutes to me an important step on my journey. By practicing the Four Things, by earnestly and honestly asking for forgiveness, by truly forgiving without seeking incentive, by expressing gratefulness and loving as unconditionally as my human limitations allow me to, I desire 'to become the change I want to see in the world'. At this point of my life (loss of my mother, rapidly ageing father, mother-in-law clinically diagnosed with terminal illness, lately blessed with two grand-children), this book fills myself with hope, joy, popularity and love of life. This imminently spiritual book is helping me in letting obstacles such as resentment, anger, fear, disgrace, guilt, remorse, and all their relatives too numerous to list here fall away, leaving in their stead a vast openness for profound gratefulness and tranquility. I think this is what some of us all would call happiness.
Thank you Doctor Byock.
For the readers who are actively over a route to spirituality and are touched by Dr Byock's writing, I would firmly recommend the recent book " Dying to be me - my journey from cancer to around death to true healing" by Anita Moorjani., A really nice book that is helpful for practically anyone, even though it is dealing primarily with people who are dealing with death - their own, or that of a loved one. It boils things down nicely. I actually purchased it for my Dad who is in Hospice, but he is old school, together no interest in it. I just uncovered that an alienated friend has end period cancer. I wanted to write a letter, but kept stalling out. Our sister had just came back this book after borrowing it, and when I actually browsed Chapter One again, it inspired me with the format for my letter. Writing that page applying this book helped myself with closure, but also, I was surprised at exactly how it helped me to process a lot of feelings I had buried. This book allowed me to understand all my feelings about my friend, and find a peaceful location to decide in with what our relationship was and wasn't, and be okay with all of it.
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